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Gay Times December 11 - Issue 400


Lady Gaga

We’ve written a letter to Mother. The address says Haus of Gaga

Dear Lady Gaga,

We’d like to officially sanction your position as the Greatest Female Gay Icon of our generation. We’re finally over that rainbow, and Judy just doesn’t cut it any more. So here are the keys to our kingdom, we hope you like the furnishings. Of course you can wear them, as long as they come back in one piece.
Some people may gripe that you’re, well, self-appointed for this position. That’s why we’re writing this letter. You got the job. We’ve listened to the nay-sayers, but from where we’re standing, you don’t steal from the gays, you learn from them. And give back. That’s because none of us got enough love in our childhood, and that’s showbiz. Your fame is Warholian. Your thoughts are Wildean. And your looks are crafted from the hardest working gays in the Haus. We’re jealous of your outfits and your harem of tight-lipped fashionistas have helped you create every artistic impulse you could ever have. Meat. Eggs. Male alter egos. Marilyn Manson cast offs. All yours for the taking, and you took them and twisted them into something shiny and new. Not just gratuitous sexual titillation – we can get that any day of the week (Saturdays). No, you’re not “sexy” sexy. You’re androgyny sexy, deviant sexy, we want your ugly, we want your desire sexy. Anyone can be sexy when you put it like that.
As practising homosexuals, we’ve got a lot to thank you for, Ga (can we just call you Stef?). Your unwavering championing of gay rights has genuinely moved us at times. When you dedicated the song Hair to Jamey Rodemeyer, a boy who was bullied to death, we wondered how many little monsters hear your songs and think “Fuck you, bullies. I‘m on the right track”. When you ended a cute anecdote about being a fairygrandmother to Elton John’s baby on Jonathan Ross’ show, and explicitly linked it to gay rights and acceptance, we did an internal salute. No one else is regularly making these public links from celebrity to everyday lives. It’s an astoundingly simple concept, that we should be treated the same as heterosexuals. But we still need global superstars to give out little reminders. So that all of us, drags, queens, Lebanese, one and all, have the same basic rights to get on with our lives and not end them prematurely.

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Photo: Terry Richardson, as featured in Lady Gaga x Terry Richardson, published by Hodder and Stoughton.

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