How to boost your confidence in the workplace
Annie Ashdown, founder of The Self Confidence Centre in London's Harley Street, offers some exclusive advice to GT readers...
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All the gay men I have ever encountered are witty, kind, bright and incredibly talented. Everyone, myself included falls in love with a gay man, yet many gay men suffer from low self- esteem and lack of confidence at work.
Get vigorously honest and ask yourself – Do you?
· say sorry too much
· say yes too much
· talk too much
· take everything personally
· complain behind others’ backs
· suffer from perfectionism
· not speak up
· use hedge words
We have all seen it before: a confident colleague gets the best assignments, gets promoted, and gets recognition. Many who work hard, arrive on time and sit back get left behind. Here’s the thing, being technically good at your job these days isn’t enough. Not everyone wants to become a world leader, but when you have self-confidence you become a leader in your own world. Self – confidence is a learned skill and acts as the backdrop in your life as the foundation of success. Not only does it make you feel good about yourself but it also means you set larger goals and determine your own definition of success, rather adopting than anyone else’s.
When you do not have a strong sense of self or a robust inner self in the work force, you leave yourself wide open to disrespect and even verbal abuse. Living in this fast-paced, challenging world without self-confidence is dangerous.
In the workforce the ability of leaders, teams and individuals to be flexible, patient, tenacious, integral, creative and most of all, confident, are the only certainties that matter. Self - confidence and high self -esteem bring meaning and value to people and to business. There’s nothing more powerful than feeling comfortable in yourself, even when the situation is challenging. It’s also essential you are aware how you interact with others and be able to adapt where needed.
In order to enhance relationships at work and improve business you have to create an impact. You have to change your consciousness in order to build a connection to yourself. You are NOT ‘less than anyone else’. You are perfectly imperfect and when you build on what you have, you will experience incredible changes in your life. Your perception of yourself has a huge impact on how others perceive you. You cannot truly thrive if you do not possess self-confidence.
“I have huge insecurities, consciousness is everything and all things begin with a thought. We are responsible for our own fate. We reap what we sow, we get what we give and we pull in what we put out” Madonna.
Never underestimate the power of the spoken word. Your thoughts create your reality, and when you are being assertive it is crucial you use words that have an absence of doubt.
Annie suggests you change:
· ‘I think’ to ‘I know’.
· ‘I’ll try’ to ‘I will’.
· ‘I’m not sure’ to ‘I am certain’.
· ‘Maybe’ to ‘definitely’.
· ‘Possibly’ to ‘I will confirm that’.
· ‘I may be wrong about that’ to ‘I am confident about that’.
· ‘I’ll see’ to ‘I can’ or ‘I will’.
· ‘It’s OK, it doesn’t matter’ to ‘here’s what I would like’.
Why? Because you are worth it. Make it happen. It’s YOUR time to shine!
The Confidence Factor: The Seven Secrets of Successful People by Annie Ashdown is available now via Amazon. See more at Annie's website.