Dylan Jones

Painful pastels

Scandinavia's darkest new creation.

Those crazy Swedes are at it again. Maybe it's all those cold meats they eat, or perhaps it's because they live in darkness for a few months a year. Either way, the video for Scandinavian starlet Marie Serneholt's cover of Barbie Girl is...concerning. In fact, some people would pay a lot of money and risk breaking a lot of laws and the possibility of ingesting horse tranquilizer to induce the neural effects that Marie Serneholt manages to trigger in the space of one minute and twenty-four seconds. Compared to the prospect of watching this, say, a hundred times, waterboarding, bamboo torture and amputation would seem like encouraging prospects. It'd be a great torture method. There's even a karaoke-style lyric scroll. In pink. So you can sing along between your screams, if you like.

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