Bananarama's Retirement Gig Last Night
Warning: Ageist Review Ahoy.
Okay, before the nutty 'nana fans start foaming at their false teeth, it was not (officially) their retirement gig. They have no (official) plans to retire. But it might be worth a thought.
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They played at The Garage last night, which was nowhere near as busy as last time I was there - even after giving the tickets away. The venue was just free condoms short of being turned into a gayclub, as 200 homosexual gentlemen of a certain age came to see Bananarama go through their motions. When they finally got onstage, the number of women in the room doubled.
The following performance consisted of said two women stumbling around in the semblance of a dance routine, fags on every side of them, whilst shouting along to their own songs. They spunked out their* biggest song Venus second, which was a premature ejaculation if ever there was one (the emphasis being on mature). The biggest problem with Bananrama’s sound is that they’re so desperately pandering to their gay audience that they’ve ruined the songs they were loved for in the first place. All of the old ‘classics’ got an Almighty reworking, with ridiculously beefed up basslines and Generic 4/4 Dance Beats added to EVERYTHING. At one point it was such a Britney production values rip off, it was like watching my gran doing Karaoke.
Still, it was a lovely send off and it must have left them with a warm glowing feeling, getting all their fans in one room.
*a cover version