If you're already sick of Katy Perry's bar-sexual ode I Kissed A Girl...
Here's the anti-dote.
We're really hating on Katy Perry this month - you'll have to wait for the September issue to find out why and see just how many gold stars we don't give her.
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However, you can rely on a faggy New Yorker to partially right some wrongs. Max Vernon has covered her US number 1 and instead of Katy's pillow bursting, frilly faux lesbianism for straight boys (notice how she never actually kisses a girl in her vid?) here's a shoddy homemade queer version, with real girls eating their make-up. As Max does.